Test Results

Friday, May 9 Dr. Jennings called and left me a voicemail.  It sounded urgent.  I called her back and she gave me the news - my perfect boy had Down's Syndrome. I made it through most of the call without crying. She wanted him to get re-checked for jaundice and to see a lactation specialist on Sunday and get an echo done on Monday. Down's Syndrome babies tend to have heart problems. Dr. Jennings also gave me resource information for the Children's Hospital Special Needs Clinic in Seattle, who apparently are the experts in the field.

I made Matt call to get the echo scheduled. I cried and cried.  I decided I needed to hold my baby so even though I was sobbing, I entered the living room and told my parents and Matt's mom. I held and kissed Russell.

My mom went into action and started calling family. I wouldn't let her call them in front me, I was crying enough as it was and to hear her say that Russell had Down's over and over, would just make me cry harder. I sent a message to my cousin Kim who is the only person I know that has a personal relationship with someone who has Downs. I couldn't talk about it then but hope to in the next couple of days.

The response from family and friends was overwhelming.  It helped give me hope that everything was going to work out.

That night, and the following days, were more of the same, crying, learning, hoping that tests would come back with positive news and trying to get my head and heart one the same page - everything was going to be ok.  Russell was loved by so many people no matter what happened. Matt has been amazing to me, trying to get me to see that most people struggle with one thing or another - we just know it from birth with Russell.