Today

Today started at 4 a.m. I woke up in a panic because my alarm did not go off at 12 like it was supposed to. Russell couldn't have formula after 1:30 a.m. so I wanted to makes sure he ate.  I didn't really need to worry since I knew my parents and Matt were on top of things, but it's my job as a Mom to worry about making sure my son gets the food he needs. I finally rolled out of bed about 4:30 and got ready.  I woke my parents to say goodbye to Russell and give kisses.  We left about 5:10 which was ridiculous (I knew it was) since it took us 20 minutes to get to the hospital, but I wanted to make sure we were checked-in by 6:15 as directed. Nothing was going stop this heart surgery if I had anything to do with it.

We waited for awhile in the waiting room until they called us about 7:30. Chip and Mary (Matt's parents) got to come back and give kisses. Then we met a few more people, saw the surgeon and hugged and kissed him one last time.  I made Matt hand him over, I wasn't going to hand over my baby boy.  I cried but was fine before we got to the waiting room.

I didn't allow any medical talk or any other talk that wasn't 100% positive.  It was the only way to possibly keep me from crying, which I didn't do at all while we were waiting. Pretty impressive, if I do say so myself. However, every time the pager went off for us to call I got a little nervous. Every update was positive.

Finally, we got the call to meet with the surgeon.  When we arrived he was smiling.  He asked how we were and I said, "You're smiling so I'm good." Everything went well.  Matt asked the medical questions and I asked the "Mom" questions: when can I see him (about 30 minutes) and when can I hold him (probably tomorrow but I can hold his hand now).

My parents, Matt and I (Chip and Mary left for a bit once he was out of surgery) got to visit him in the ICU. They took off after a minutes, we got the orientation and Matt is now somewhat asleep in the chair.  He must be tired if he is napping and doing so in a chair.

Russell is doing well.  He has tubes and wires coming out all over him but it is not as traumatic to see it as I thought it would be. The staff and Matt did a good job of preparing me for it.

Russell has woken up a bit then fallen back to sleep pretty quick so I've been able to see his eyes. I loved it.

I think I'm going to try to sleep a bit.